My friends, I come to you today to confess.
I have tried to live my life the way a Good Liberal(ish) person should. I just re-upped my membership with the local NPR station. Every time a new decal appears on my bags of coffee beans, I try to steer my purchases toward those with its benison. (Right now I’m aware of “organic,” “fair trade” and “shade grown.” I’m probably missing at least one, but I make up for it by buying stuff that’s locally roasted.) I send my kid to the local Montessori school and donated an item to be included in their upcoming benefit auction. I recycle assiduously, and plan to start composting again any day now. I drive a Prius!
But still I write to you today a broken, penitent man. No matter what I do, I know I cannot cleanse myself of the blot that continues to stain my soul. Why?
I can never seem to remember my reusable bags at the grocery store, and thus continue to slowly choke Mother Gaia with plastic.
It’s not like the store doesn’t try to be helpful. “Did you remember your reusable bags?” the sign by the entrance politely inquires. And just about every time I pass it I swear softly under my breath. Our home has an ample supply of them, which I never think to toss back in the car. The Better Half is a much more virtuous soul, and seems to remember them much more than me. But even on the glorious days I actually think to bring them, I never remember to put them back in the car once they’ve been emptied.
So that’s this week’s question — do any of you join me in deviating from the Right and Proper Ways of All Decent Americans? Though I am more familiar with the mores on the leftward side of the dial, I know that you conservatives out there must also have social expectations that press upon you, so feel free to share! Come, ye who are heavy laden under the weight of your sins against society, and I will nod sympathetically.