The Aristocrap

There’s a movie called The Aristocrats1 which shows a lot of different comedians telling variants of this joke:

“My partner and I have this great act. We go on stage, and we strip naked. Then we *()(*((*&, and we change positions and we &*&^&(( some more. Then I douse him in %&&^%$$ and instead of ^&***^ing, we $^^^%$%^. Then we ask for volunteers from the audience, and we &*&^^& them.”

“And what do you call your act?”

“The Aristocrats.”

As jokes go, it’s pretty pointless. This is, paradoxically, the point of the film, which shows how different comics make it funny by tailoring it to their particular style. Some tell it in a highly refined fashion, while other go for the full gross-out. One woman switches it up, describing a performance of classical ballet called the %$^&(*&*ing %$#@&^*$%#ers. Robin Williams, who’s very capable of working blue, perversely tells clean Borscht Belt jokes instead. (A rabbi walks into a bar with a duck on his head. Bartender says “Where’d you get that?” Duck says “Brooklyn. There’s hundreds of them.”)

So, this post is an invitation to all of you to show off your comic chops by making this joke your own:

“Did you hear someone hacked Trump’s Twitter account? They posted all kinds of rants and gibberish and craziness.”

“How could you tell?”

Image by The Aristocrap

  1. Not The Aristocats, which is a Disney cartoon. People with small children should keep this in mind. []
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3 thoughts on “The Aristocrap

  1. So, Trump’s Twitter account got hacked last night. First it was just saying obscene insults about politicians – “Rand Paul is so dumb he doesn’t know where to stick his dick in the pig. Sad!” and “John McCain is such a loser that he thinks getting out of prison means he won the war. Stupid!”

    Then it got on to insulting the press, “The New York Times isn’t fit to be used as a tampon for Crooked Hillary. Sloppy!” and also “Jeff Bezos is so dumb that he thinks that The Washington Post is a real newspaper. Maybe some day. Pinocchio!”

    Then there were the photoshopped images, ranging from photoshopping Hillary and Bernie’s faces onto bondage porn, to a gang rape porn tape with current EPA officials photoshopped as the perps and Lady Liberty as the target.

    The hijack was ended this morning at about 7. It was terrible. I didn’t get any sleep at all.

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