Did you have business in Boston today that forced you to drive anywhere near Fenway Park at midday? No?
You should be increeeeeeeeedibly happy about that.
If you were forced to drive anywhere near Fenway, I was the guy on Boylston in the silver Prius screaming obscenities. The one whose head looked like it was going to explode? Yes. Me.
I’d also like to extend the middle finger of friendship to all the people who drove in for the festivities and decided the hospital parking structures were a good place to leave their cars. Because today is such a magic, wonderful day, of course nobody could possibly need convenient access to Children’s Hospital, Beth Israel-Deaconess Medical Center, Dana Farber Cancer Institute or Brigham and Women’s Hospital. Heavens no! Fill up the structure! People who might have patients to take care of or medical care to seek can just keep driving! An extra heaping helping of love to those of you who stood around your cars, drinking beer out of the trunk.
If you’ll excuse me, I’m headed out to run off several hundred kilowatts of accumulated rage.
Could you have sicced security or the police on them?
The police, at least, probably had bigger fish to fry at the time.
I thought Boston had reasonably efficient public transportation. In fact, I can specifically recall that on my one lifetime visit to Boston, I took the “T” — to Fenway Park, near which my friends and I enjoyed the hospitality of a nearby brewpub (the BoSox were not in town that evening). Are you telling me that baseball fans in Boston are too good for the city’s reasonably efficient public transportation network?
Why yes! Yes, as a matter of fact it does! Quite a good public transportation system, as it happens, and one that will dump passengers right at Fenway Park’s doorstep should they choose. If, in my leisure, I was to travel to a famous and storied location to watch multimillionaires throw balls at each other, I would probably avail myself of that very system in order to get there.
You’d think the fans of the city’s sports franchises, who seem so boisterously full of civic pride, would be aware of it.
Brigham and Womens Hospital
Now serving both Brigham and Womens!
Parking optional.
Of course, I chose the easy one.
It’s going to be a lot harder for me to come up with something for Dana Farber Cancer Institute.