From ESPN The Magazine’s “The Body” issue…
MLB All-Star Jose Bautista
WNBA MVP Candace Parker
NFL All-Pro Rob Gronkowski
Tennis Player Daniela Hantuchova
Now, if only we can pretend this never happened, we could ALL be sports fans…
If THESE Don’t Get Russell/JayBird/MissMary/EVERYONE Into Sports, I don’t know what will..
Do I perhaps sound more particular than a woman in her late 30s should if I reject the first guy because I find his beard and manscaping off-putting?
Only if you agree I don’t sound too misogynistic for rejecting the first woman because I think the WNBA should be illegal.
Only if the reason you think the WNBA should be illegal is because women should be permitted to be in the regular NBA if they qualify rather than in a separate-but-not-really-equal league. (Not that I necessarily agree with that, but it seems justifiable.)
I actually have no issue with a woman playing in the NBA (or any other league) that her talent allows for. If she makes it on her merits, what reason would I have to object?
My reason for hating the WNBA is two-fold…
1.) Lower the goddamn hoops. The number of women who’ve dunked in a game can be counted on one hand. While dunking isn’t the end-all, be-all, playing above the rim is gazillion times more interesting than playing below the rim. Refusing to do this seems to be a thickskulled attempt at making the leagues slightly-less-not-equal, when in reality, it simply demonstrates that they’re unwilling to think of women and women’s basketball as a unique sport that need not hold all the conventions of men’s basketball.
2.) The WNBA would be out of business if the NBA wasn’t propping it up. Which means at least a non-zero amount of the money I spend on the NBA goes to the WNBA. Women’s sports leagues, just like any other sports leagues, should exist on their own merits.
But who am I kidding? I’m still into Ms. Parker.
Well, yes. She’s quite attractive.
And Gronkowski’s fists look WAY photoshopped. But hey, enjoy the scenery.
Eh, it’s like looking at a building.
What are you going to talk about? “Oh, so you hit things with other things, do you?”
Hrm. I suppose there is the whole “I enjoy eating 4000 calories in one sitting” topic.
Looking at a building? Or talking to a building? I’m confused…
And I’m sure most of these folks have other things to talk about. I mean, Rob Gronkowski dated a porn star and went on stage with LMFAO. ATHLETES… THEY’RE JUST LIKE US!
Oh yeah, everyone I know has dated a porn star and they are constantly on stage with popular music groups. Totally.
“has dated a porn star and they are constantly on stage with popular music groups”
Know what I call that? Tuesday.
And that was a slow Tuesday Night.
Winning!
What does it say about me that I would rather see Dwight Howard dessed in Laker warmups on the cover than any of these women dressed in nothing?
It says that you have the good taste to recongize that Daniela Hantuchova is just a mite too skinny; Candace Parker, however, is… not.
That I have yet another name to call Laker fans.
Not fair Kazzy. I was slightly interested before the naked people. But this helps 🙂
At what point during the game do the athletes disrobe? I had no idea that was the case! I will, of course, start watching right away. Is it during the 7th inning “stretch”?
Although, if I were to be totally honest, I actually kind of like the uniforms. I think they give an appealing look to the people wearing them. That said, if I were to make the acquaintance of either of these gentlemen similarly attired, I suspect I would find a way to be happy about it.
Actually, every sport has 5 minutes of nudity. However…
1.) It occurs only after at least 2/3 of the game has elapsed,
2.) Is only viewable to folks who’ve watched the entirety of the game to that point,
-AND-
3.) Is automatically cancelled if anyone says, “When are they getting naked?”
The David Wells era was a tough one.
Why does it have four covers?
There were actually a few others. They make different covers, sometimes for different regions, sometimes specific to consumers if they know their preferences, sometimes just random. All the photos are in the spread, but the cover varies.
Yes, Brandon, that would have been a good question had we not all been distracted my the nakedness.
They should do these kinds of spreads for all types of magazines. Like, Science Weekly. Have a bunch of geeks in goggles naked in front of chalkboards with ungodly long equations on them or holding beakers and flasks of smoking chemicals.
Finance Today. Bunch of CPA and Econ folks with their pencils and 1099’s naked in boardroom and client meeting settings.
Cooking Light. Pictures of Emeril and Paula Dean and Paul Prudhomme naked while basting breasts and roasting wienies.
Make sure I get some kick back for these ideas when one of you enterprising people runs with it.
That would be hot.
You do not want to see the covers of the American Economic Review!
I would pay a million billion dollars for the science one.
I might be able to arrange that one.
Doesn’t your green lantern ring let you visualize that and make it?
Well, Danica McKellar (she of “Wonder Years” fame) happened to grow up hot and enough of a math whiz to get a theorem named after her during college, then also appeared in Maxim and magazines such as that. So, that’s one way to do it.
The truth is, while it’s harder, you can find “hot” people in just about every job. Hell, I’ve seen attractive people working at Taco Bell before. And I wasn’t even in LA at the time.
I was surprised Ronda Rousey did this issue too. Pleasantly so. Knockout in the cage and out…