Thanksgiving Football Update

It’s halftime in Tennessee-Detroit, and the score is 35-10. I think I’ll just check on the box score later (I’m playing LenDale White today; he’s already got two TD’s under his belt) because the Flaming Thumbtacks of Nashville have obviously got this one under control.

There’s talk of giving the Thanksgiving Day game to a team other than Detroit because the Lions have stunk so badly since 1992. I don’t approve of the idea. Detroit’s played on Thanksgiving since 1932, and while a tradition needs to make sense to remain vital, I also say that if there’s no compelling reason to change a tradition, then by all means keep it. There is no reason to think that whatever game would replace the annual Slaughter Of The Lions we’ve come to look forward to every year would be any better. What would the NFL have replaced this game with? Indianapolis at Cleveland? Ravens-Bengals? At the start of the season, those looked like they would have been good games, but at this point there’s no reason to think they’re going to be particularly more interesting than this one.

Which reminds me:

Q. How do the Detroit Lions count?
A. 0-1, 0-2, 0-3, 0-4, 0-5, 0-6, 0-7, 0-8, 0-9, 0-10, 0-11, 0-12.

Q: What do the Detroit Lions and opossums have in common?
A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road.

Q: Where’s the safest place in a tornado?
A: The Lions’ end zone at Ford Field: there are never any touchdowns there!

Q: Why doesn’t Los Angeles have a professional football team?
A: Because then Detroit would want one, too.

Q: How do you keep a Detroit Lion out of your yard?
A: Put up goal posts.

Burt Likko

Pseudonymous Portlander. Homebrewer. Atheist. Recovering litigator. Recovering Republican. Recovering Catholic. Recovering divorcé. Recovering Former Editor-in-Chief of Ordinary Times. House Likko's Words: Scite Verum. Colite Iusticia. Vivere Con Gaudium.