A Love Note To My Wife

Thank you.  Thank you thank you thank you thank you.

For not wanting to have children.

Oh, and for the cleaning and work you do around the house and taking care of the animals and supporting me in my many endeavors and being affectionate and friendly and a good companion and a good friend.

But tonight, I’m especially grateful that you share my lack of desire to have children around.

Thank you, my darling.  I love you and I’m very very happy that we get to spend our child-free lives together.

Burt Likko

Pseudonymous Portlander. Homebrewer. Atheist. Recovering litigator. Recovering Republican. Recovering Catholic. Recovering divorcé. Recovering Former Editor-in-Chief of Ordinary Times. House Likko's Words: Scite Verum. Colite Iusticia. Vivere Con Gaudium.


  1. Right back at ya! It's the little things that make a marriage work. Or in our case, lack of little things (aka kids), that makes our relationship a very, very, VERY happy one!

  2. Hey TL,Was just perusing some of your recent posts and thought I would check in on this one. I don't have any problem with any person not wanting to have kids. In fact, as a minister I have done pre-marital counseling with couples who professedly don't want kids and in one case a couple came to me only because a different minister wouldn't perform or bless the marriage only because they didn't want kids. Also, as a minister I have known couples who were miserable parents and would have been much better off if they didn't have kids. But, here is the question. What happens if you do have kids? It does happen and we don't always know why. I mean, we understand the basics but even when very sophisticated means are used to avoid it the critters still sometimes find a way to get through.So, if for some reason you do end up with a child, how would you manage the situation. It is a good question. It happens often and figuring out a way to make it positive rather than negative is important.Obviously, the quick answer might be abortion or adoption but there are many people who wouldn't feel comfortable with either. Even those who follow one or the other course of action struggle with the decision. Wisdom on how to handle the emotional turmoil surrounding those two issues or keeping an unwanted child can be helpful to many people.Maybe a response could warrant a new post. I would be interested to read.

  3. I suspect that The Wife and I would probably be at least decent parents. But neither of us want to do it and it would feel like a chore most of the time. That's one reason TL is looking into voluntary sterilization at this time. I don't know for sure whether we'd terminate or adopt out if precautions failed us, as we know several people who want kids but can't have them and it seems unfair that those who want them, can't, and those who don't, can. But I don't know that nine months of carrying around a gestating child wouldn't have a profound effect on both of us and I treasure my ignorance on that subject.

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